Morning thoughts

I'm still on the road, awake and dressed for work. I still have some time, so I am watching CNN and browsing favorite sites on the web. Sites that I am paying more attention to now have to do with - you guessed it - HIV infection, specifically ways to combat the virus naturally.

Good sites will tell you - there are no natural supplements that have the fire-power of the designer pharmaceutical medications specifically designed to battle the HIV virus. BUT - many of these supplements do not have the dangers associated with the prescription medications. While there may be side effects and long term dangers associated with supplement use, they are generally milder and less severe than prescription medications.

I am not going into this hoping to find some herb or vitamin that will magically cure the infection. I am just hoping that there is a supplement or combination of supplements that will be able to delay the need to start the powerful prescription anti-retrovirals.

I am encouraged by the people I am meeting who are taking HAART therapy. Many of them are reporting that the side-effects are minimal and well tolerated. There doesn't seem to be the issues of nausea / vomiting, lipodystrophy, etc as in years past. These are the things that worry me. But I do want to do some research on liver / kidney / other vital organ damage associated with the new medications.

For me - so much of this diagnosis directly relates to quality of life. What can I do to minimize the impact this virus and its' treatment will have on my health and well-being? I don't want to be homebound because I am afraid of diarrhea. I don't want to look in the mirror and see sunken cheeks and a buffalo hump...

I am not feeling the worry and fear that I had when I was first diagnosed. But so much of this remains unclear. I am taking supplements that are reported to have positive impacts on CD4 counts as well as supplements that have natural anti-HIV effects. I go in next week to have blood tests done per my agreement with my doctor. I know what I want to see happen. What I hope for is a moderate reduction in my viral load and a modest increase in my CD4 count.

I think about this. Wouldn't I rather be on the anti-retrovirals and see the dramatic results that have been reported? Wouldn't an undetectable viral load and an increasing CD4 count be worth its' weight in gold for my peace of mind? It's very tempting to buy into that. But the concern remains - once going on meds, it's very hard to ever be off them again for anything more than a drug holiday. From what I have heard from folks - the drug holidays are short lived, and the viral rebound is dramatic in many cases. So once I start meds - it's important to remain on them, despite the negative impact they may present for long term health.

Any thoughts?